Red Alert

I had (a radio) once, but I threw it up against the wall when I couldn't figure out where the batteries went. I know now I was suffering from pre-menstrual syndrome.
-Dolly Parton in "Steel Magnolias"

Ever have one of those moments?

I did today.

It was the most supremely gorgeous day, and I was dying to take Liam for a walk. Getting out of the house with him takes all day, so at about 4 o'clock we set out for the Arboretum. I think it's a law in Lexington that you have to go to the Arboretum on the first pretty day of the year. So being the law-abiding citizens we are, Liam and I went.

However, we didn't get to walk. And I'm getting all riled up again just typing about it!

Breathe.
Breathe.

Ok, what it boils down to is this: I didn't do enough research when I picked out his 'big boy' stroller. It has a storage basket that isn't even big enough for a college textbook (no exaggeration.) And it provides zero shade, even though it comes with a shade. You can move it down to cover the top half of his body, but then the sun glares down on the top of his head. With a bigger kid, it wouldn't matter so much. But with a caucasian baby who has been inside his whole life, it matters.

So we were there for less than five minutes, and left. I couldn't let my baby get sunburned.

So this is where the PMS kicks in.

When putting the stroller back in the trunk, I had serious (again, no joking) thoughts about throwing it on the ground. In hindsight, I would have also enjoyed running over it. As I was driving away, I almost cried. I have been cooped up in the house for months now, and I really thought today would be the day that I would get out. And I'm fat, and I will die fat (these are the ultra-constructive thoughts I was having in the moment.) My next clue that PMS was rearing its ugly head: I gave serious, serious thought to rear-ending a car that was taking too long to turn.

None of this has been exaggerated. This is exactly how it all went down.

The cure?

Driving around Lexington aimlessly for 45 minutes, praying, drinking Diet Coke, and listening to Shane & Shane, while my sweet little boy slept in the backseat.

Just had to get that out.
I feel better.

Now it's time to eat the Chipotle my husband brought home.