Bottles

We own six 8 oz bottles. Baby bottles, that is. And as I was washing some of them tonight, I couldn't help but remember the early days, when six bottles weren't enough to get us through 24 hours. My hands were chapped, cracked, and bleeding in those days. I washed a lot of bottles. I would sleep with vitamin A & D ointment on my hands. And today, my son transitioned himself from eating 4 times a day to eating 3 times a day. It might not seem like much of a difference, but it is. I remember how each time he dropped a bottle, that it seemed like new possibilities were opening up. I remember how it felt when I only had to wash bottles once a day. I remember how empowered I felt when I decided to feed him five 6 oz bottles instead of six 5 oz bottles. I remember the transition to four 8 oz bottles, and how I would have been happy to stay there forever. But Liam decided today that he wanted his 3 squares a day, thank you very much. So we've gone from not having enough bottles to get through 24 hours, to having enough bottles for 2 days.

Does it seem like I'm making a big deal out of nothing? I might be. But I am just continually reminded of how quickly things change with kids. The early days were so hopeless for me, in many ways. It just never seemed like things would get better. And today, I went to the mall with him, had LOTS of laughs and snuggles with him, fed him 3 times, and put him to bed at 7:00.

No matter where you are in life, things will change. The good things will change. The bad things will change. God is our only constant. Hold on to Him, and enjoy the ride.

Baby

I'm learning a lot about God now that I'm a parent. Shocking, right? I really think that's why he let me be a Mom, so I would learn more about him. I can read things in a book, and have some understanding, but I learn much better through listening (like a sermon) and through experience.

What brought this train of thought on was my son's reaction to a diaper change yesterday. He hates having his diaper changed 99% of the time. Especially when it's time to eat, and he can see his bottle sitting on the table. But I have this thing about letting my little boy sit in his own waste. I just don't like it. So, before I feed him, I lay him down to check and/or change his diaper. I do this about 99% of the times that I feed him, so he really shouldn't be shocked. But every time I do it, he falls apart. His life is over. He is so hungry that he is going to die.

He doesn't realize that what Mommy is doing is actually a good thing, that it will help him in the long run. He doesn't know about diaper rash and UTI's and all kinds of other unpleasantries like those. All he can see is the bottle he's not eating. And he doesn't even realize that he'll be eating it in 2 minutes or less (I'm a pretty quick diaper-changer these days.)

How many times do we fall apart when we think God isn't giving us what we need? How many times have you cried your eyes out because things didn't turn out like you thought? I sure have. I'm such a baby.

But I'm God's baby. And He loves me more than I will ever know.

Faith

We have started going to Saturday night church. It's much more laid back, not as crowded, and it gives us Sunday mornings to sleep in a little. We're big fans. As we were sitting in church this past Saturday night, and I held my sleeping son, I was thinking about how when we got up that morning, we weren't sure if we were going to be able to make it to church that night. Having a baby makes it impossible to make plans with any certainty. You just have to keep moving forward, and keep trying, and hope you make it to your destination.

While reflecting on this, a few verses popped into my head:

Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.
Matthew 6:34

Give us today our daily bread.
Matthew 6:11

Now listen, you who say, “Today or tomorrow we will go to this or that city, spend a year there, carry on business and make money.” Why, you do not even know what will happen tomorrow. What is your life? You are a mist that appears for a little while and then vanishes. Instead, you ought to say, “If it is the Lord’s will, we will live and do this or that.”
James 4:13-15

If you've read any of my previous posts, you know that my husband and I are planners. We like to have things figured out 50 paces ahead. But the truth of the matter is this: Today is the only day we can do anything about. Sure, it's good to look ahead and have goals. But I think God is really trying to teach us to walk one step at a time. Where is faith if you can see the future? God gives us what we need today, and that's all we need to worry about. He's never left us high and dry.

I am thankful to have a Father who loves me enough to grow my faith in Him.

Close Call

Yikes!! I almost forgot to post!! I would have been so mad; I've posted 14 days in a row now. That's quite a streak for me!!

Perhaps the reason I forgot to post is.......my husband got a job!!!!!!!!!

We are so, so blessed......

And it looks like I might get to stay home with Liam during the week, and just work Saturdays!!!!

The blessings are just being poured out on this little family of three.

I want to be sure that we learn everything God wanted us to learn from our mere 3 week journey through unemployment. Some things I've realized thus far:

-we have too much wiggle room in our budget
-we don't 'need' as much as we thought we do
-people who don't have jobs have a really, really tough road
-God is our provider, and He loves us more than we love Liam (WHOA!)

I'll continue to process these past few weeks, as the weather warms and I get to try out that new jogging stroller......

Valley Girl

Why do we have to go through the valley? I mean, can't we go over it? Around it? Walk right up to the edge and say, "Whew! Yeah, that's pretty bad. Thanks for sparing me from that, God! You're so good to me!!"

We're roughly 10 days in to Will's unemployment. And we're starting to get nervous. When we found out that he was going to lose his job, it was actually exciting. We saw it as an opportunity for him to try something new, and to finally find what it is that he is passionate about. We felt that God had given him a great opportunity.

Something has changed.

I can't point to the exact moment that it happened, but somewhere in the past 10 days, reality has hit. We have bills. And a son. A son who eats ridiculously expensive formula. And goes to the doctor. Which requires insurance. And it all costs money. And this economy isn't the greatest. And the people he's had 2 interviews with still haven't called back.

So why hasn't God just laid Will's next job in his lap already? I mean, why put us through this?

Because He loves us, and wants to teach us. And stretch us.

Rats.